Soul Talk

Life seemed a lot easy during the days of the Prophet (Pbuh) as people had lesser options, needs were less and the focus of lives of people those days was to do good to others, only to please Allah.

But as times changed, the world had more things to offer to people-be it in matter of comforts of life or even in matter of earning their daily bread. So from the farmer to the software techies, its all about slogging to make a living. Working for a cause seems to be looked upon as something old-fashioned… more so working for the Muslim cause or a cause that would benefit mankind by way of spreading the word of Allah.

Does one work for a cause as a hobby, to spend spare time or is it more towards gaining the pleasure of Allah. All beings on this earth need to work hard for a living, make money for a secure future for themselves and their families and then… if their time permits, they look towards spending their time and energy for a cause.


Till today working for a “Cause 24x7” is seen as an exclusive endeavour of those who have no ambitions, no desires to have a designation beside their names and no desire to make money. Or worse still, there are some who think that those working for a cause have loads of money piled up in their backyard, they have retired from life early and now are doing it as ‘time-pass' (apologies to a brand of chips that goes by the same name).

‘ You can work for a religious cause if you have already made lots of money and then spend time on a cause of Allah,' said a friend to me.

“ You are young, now's the time to make money, your career, do one thing, get a job that pays you Rs 25,000, then donate Rs 5000 out of it to an orphanage, you have done something for a cause,' said another.

Taken in the right spirit-fine, but what I fail to make people understand that those of us who have dedicated our life to a cause-be it a religious cause, it could be something for the disabled, something for the poor, something for the senior citizens or for that matter even something to protect wildlife, its the passion that matters. Remember a famous wildlife expert who said on the television - “I will live and die for the tigers” that's the passion that cannot be exhibited in words to the world.


“Why are you suffering? Why are you running around for the community? Why are you trying to transform the world?” These are typical statements anybody working for a cause has to possibly listen to from concerned friends and foes alike.

It takes a brave heart to stand up against all odds and keep your word for a cause. Take a simple example –somebody's victorian type villa house comes crashing down on a rainy midnight, the family has to be shifted and lots of things to be done. The person has made a commitment to be somewhere for a cause-a workshop needs to be done as a promise has been made and more than that it is bound to transform lives of the participants.

You can imagine the dilemma of this person. But Allah always helps when you work for a cause with pure intentions. It so happens that not only is the person able to fulfill his duties towards his family, but also made it on the dot for the workshop. There was an option for him to stay back because of the crash. That's the passion for a cause. Come what may, you go ahead with life.

There is a false notion that people working for a cause are endowed with super-human qualities-No way! There are no special skills or qualities that one requires to work for a cause-its just that one needs to be willing to sacrifice or rather detach yourself from things that would distract you from the cause...its easy at an young age to be pulled towards different directions materialistically. But the beauty comes in defining your priorities in life. That will give you a focus towards all aspects of your life.

Working for a religious cause brings its own moments of surprises and hilarity. The Web has brought the world closer, so Islam reaches every corner of the world. So you have a certain Mr Jim Orlando from Canada who reads the Islamic publication and assumes that the team churning out the publication comprises spiritual souls with an angelic halo around their heads, with special powers to change the world. So there comes his appeal that he has been taken for a long ride by his business partner Mr Burly of Norway, who owes him lots of money, so could we cast a magic spell on Mr Burly so that his money comes back to him?

Cause as a career can have a very sobering effect on you. You learn to handle the hurts and heart-breaks, the ups and downs of your life with far more clarity by applying this principle.. “when the storms of life get you down, open your spiritual eyes and see Allah at work.”

You can pursue excellence and perfection for the cause. Mediocrity would only make you weary and tired, in the process diluting your efforts towards the cause. No matter what the circumstances around you, follow excellence as a code of conduct for yourself and others with you.

Working for a cause does not mean walk around with the “martyr” badge on you. It just means being in touch with the realities of life, being a silent warrior, keeping your own discomforts hidden from the world and keeping the passion for the cause alive in your heart till death. Easier said than done, right? If you let your heart rule over your head, you can do it!

Even though Islam accords due respect to elders and it is the duty of every Muslim to respect and serve his/her parents, the modern world is replete with a variety of sad relationships.

Old Age comes with its own set of problems. There are Medical conditions to be taken care of and Financial difficulties to be balanced, but perhaps no other problem is as severely felt by elders as that of having strained relationships with their children. Every parent dreams of having good, obedient, sub-servient and loving children. But very few among us can claim to have an ideal relationship with their grown up children. Even though Islam accords due respect to elders and it is the duty of every Muslim to respect and serve his/her parents, the modern world is replete with a variety of sad relationships. In many cases, the reason for such situations are probably created by the parents themselves, such as trying to be in control.

It is obvious, that after spending some 30 odd years independently, working hard to support one's wife and children, and making almost every decision regarding family matters, it is often very difficult for a parent to come to terms with the idea of becoming dependent of their own offsprings. To them, their children will always remain children, and they will always look upon their children as someone who needs their help rather than the other way around. Even if the parents have enough money to support themselves during their old age, they feel a burning desire to have their children and grand-children around them for comfort. But they would rather have the entire family follow their own set of instructions and rules, than adapt themselves to the background in the decision making process. Somehow it is difficult for parents to bring themselves to follow the rules set by their own children. You often hear statements such as “Am I your father, or are you mine”, “Oh come on, now don't try to teach us”, “Now these kids born yesterday are going to teach us how to lead our lives”.

Call it a ‘Generation Gap' or simply a mis-understanding, but many among us, especially those living in Urban areas are often faced with this sort of a situation. Children who are grown up, often married and leading a professionally successful life, find that inspite of getting utmost respect in the outside world, they are often treated with kid-gloves at home, by their own parents. They cannot understand why their genuinely good suggestions are not being taken in the right spirit.

Such situations can be relieved if both the concerned parties try to understand each other's position. The parents on the one hand, need to understand that if their children are grown-up, married and working in the real world, it is time that they are capable of their own independent thinking and decision making. If they require some help from you, let them ask for it. They should stop treating them as children and behave with them as someone their equal. They should allow breathing space for making mistakes and allow their children the freedom to decide how to bring up their own families. Rules and Regulations are not taken in the right spirit, and more often than not, fall on deaf ears, unless they are put as suggestions or hints. It is time to involve one's self in a Social Cause or some passionate hobby, rather than spend the entire day trying to see what their children are doing and how they are leading their lives. Its not that the children don't love them or have become rebellious or immune to their parents, its just that they want to lead their own lives, make their own mistakes and learn from their own experiences, rather than from hand-me-down knowledge. If the children are allowed their own space, they would love to have their parents and elders around them at all times.

The children on the other hand, need to understand that their parents really love them and whatever they say, is out of genuine concern for their well-being. They must appreciate the fact that their parents have spent the better part of their past lives, sacrificing, planning and providing for their smallest needs, and hence it is difficult for them to suddenly stop doing this. It will require time and patience on the children's part, to wait till their parents come to terms with the fact that they are now grown-ups and quite capable of taking care of themselves and the parents too. They must also consider the fact, that their own children might be taking lessons at Parental Treatment, by watching how they treat their own parents. If we consider ourselves as better educated and exposed than our parents, then it is our duty to understand them, rather than the other way around.

We all know that life is a cycle and that our own behaviour will one day reflect in the behaviour of our children, hence we should be careful how we treat our parents, as what goes around, comes around.